Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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