My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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