I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Randomize
