when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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