then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
