Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
