The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
be right there i have to get my cape
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Randomize
