tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
