HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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