um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
