My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
