i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize