do herpes really smell.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
