Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
