Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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