My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize