R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
