is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
