Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
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