He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
