You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
