I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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