actually, I'm a sock model
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Randomize