he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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