I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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