Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
