Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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