Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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