you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Randomize
