Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
