Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
