I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
