i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize