I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
