But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Randomize
