New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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