Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
