My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
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