You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
