so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
