Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
