I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
