Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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