my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
