Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
