If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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