i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
