Rock
Scissors
Fuck
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
