...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize