no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
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